I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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