I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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