READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
