Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
