she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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