i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I smell like Dick and happiness
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