I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
