i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
He shit in the fireplace
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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