Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize