I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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