So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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