in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize