I don't usually arrange sex via text message
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I think your dad took our porno
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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