I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
