Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
