I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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