Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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