Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
