Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
