Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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