He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize