was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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