yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize