It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Randomize