4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Randomize
