Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize