I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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