i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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