so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
