Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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