you would pick up someone in the library
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize