You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
