There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
