i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
