She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
