I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
