i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
A+ Viking dick
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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