somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize