Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
