Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
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