So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
he puts the penis in happiness.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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