I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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