We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
