you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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