Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
