Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Randomize