is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
