absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Randomize
