apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
where are you?
Hypothermia
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
