What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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