Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize